“I’m Monica, blogger of Thundercup, 20 years young, and a full-bred Californian native that eats sunshine for breakfast. I spent a few years overseas attending international school in Taiwan, but now back in the twilight zone known as Los Angeles. In my little humble abode at Sickest Addictions, I will be letting you know WHAT’S UP about anything, and everything.”

 14 things You Should Know Before You Turn 21.

To say that the past three years of my life have been life changing is an understatement. Things weren’t working out at home, and one night shortly after I turned 17, I slipped out in the middle of the night and have been living on my own since then. Fast forward to today, I have worked with the most amazing people (also an understatement) in the street wear and music industry, bought my own car, have my own place, pay my own bills, and basically do what I love doing. A lot of people, both older and younger, ask me, “How do you do it?” Don’t get me wrong, I am nowhere near reaching all of my goals yet, but you asked, so I answered. With that being said, I am turning 21 next month and I decided that I should share some things with you that I have learned through laughs, tears, pain, and joy: 14 things you should know before you turn 21.

14. School is not for everyone.

I know a lot of people will find this controversial and, yes, I understand most people think school is “the way.” I am a college student myself, but I wholeheartedly believe that school isn’t for everyone. If you have the heart and the drive to make your dreams come true and you are pursuing something that doesn’t require a degree, don’t slow yourself down just because it is the traditional way to go.

13. Start what you finish.

One of my pet peeves is when people “dip their feet in the water” – meaning they start something and then just let everything fall through the cracks, leaving it unfinished. If you’re going to do something, do it well and finish it all the way. Dedication can take you a long way and open up endless opportunities!

12. Use a condom, go to Planned Parenthood – do what you gotta do.

Self-explanatory. You can’t be having kids when you’re clearly still a kid, then end up looking like siblings when you’re out in public with them. Dumb ass.

11. Speak up!

If you need something, ask for it. If you have an idea, put it to use. Otherwise, no one will ever know.

10. Be mindful of your health.

This seems pretty simple but a lot of people forget to take care of themselves. If you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be able to do your best, and you risk having to stay home being sick. This also includes not fucking around with the entire team…herpes is not a good look.

9. Surround yourself with good people.

Turn your radar on, don’t get used by people and don’t surround yourself with people who do less than support you. I have witnessed way too many good people with potential get torn down by the people they hang out with.

8. Play hard but work harder.

FYI, for all you super ragers, there will always be times to play. ALWAYS! From the beginning of time when Adam and Eve were having a fig leaf underwear frolic-fest to present day blacked out nights at Greystone, the parties will always be there. If you miss a night out, there will be another one the week after. However, windows of opportunity don’t stay open forever, so I suggest you take it while you can.

7. Keep an open mind about who you interact with.

Literally, you never know who you’re talking to. Allow connections to be made at all times, someone can really help you out in the future if not now, and vice versa.

6. Don’t be a groupie/useless entourage.

I’m serious. That shit is annoying. It doesn’t help any of us, and unless you’re successfully fucking your way up the corporate ladder (which I do not condone whatsoever), I suggest you find a different “profession.”

5. Get a Twitter if you don’t already have one.

Twitter has opened up so many opportunities for me and its more direct and to-the-point than Facebook is. DO IT! I’m also going to shamelessly self-promote and suggest you follow @sickaddicts & @thuuundercup.

4. Take risks.

You HAVE to take risks. Believe in what you do and go for it. There are too many people filling up the world with sorrow about what they could have done. Don’t be a “could-have.”

3. Stay away from hoes.

Dead serious; this goes for both guys and girls. If you’re a girl and you hang out with hoes, chances are, you are one too or you will develop hoe tendencies. Neither is a good look. If you’re a guy, hanging out with hoes will make you lose faith in the female population.

2. Have confidence.

Believe in yourself! Really, it’s quite sad when I feel like I believe in someone more than they believe in themselves. If you start off on one foot thinking that you won’t be able to make it, you need to step back and start over, THANKS.

1. Do what you love…

…and love what you do. There are too many people in the world working jobs and doing things that they don’t like, just to get by. Find what your hobbies and talents are and find a way to make money off of it.. It is definitely worth it to fail at launching 99 times before finally landing on the moon.

“I’m Monica, blogger of Thundercup, 20 years young, and a full-bred Californian native that eats sunshine for breakfast. I spent a few years overseas attending international school in Taiwan, but now back in the twilight zone known as Los Angeles. In my little humble abode at Sickest Addictions, I will be letting you know WHAT’S UP about anything, and everything.”

There are a few questions I can always expect to be asked. “Why are your boobs so big?”, “What ethnicity are you?” But one of the questions I get asked most often is, “How is it possible for you to have stayed in a relationship with your boyfriend for so long?!” Well children, gather around. I can say that at 20 years old and in my third year of college, I am by no means an expert on relationships. In fact, like many of you, I still have a lot to learn. I can only speak for my own experience and hope to provide some insight for you.

The “secret” is to keep secrets. I don’t mean from each other, but rather, from the rest of the world. In the fast-paced, Tweeting, Facebooking times of today, everyone is constantly bombarded with images that people just cannot wait to share. Specifically, on Valentine’s Day, scrolling through your time line or newsfeed, you witness the very private moments of gift exchanging, romantic dining, and even couples snapping a shot mid-kiss. Uh, that awkward moment when your girlfriend busts out a camera while you French kiss her. We all know that one couple (or a few couples) who publicly duke it out by means of social media when they argue – “In a relationship” becomes “Single”. Then when all is well again, the relationship status reverts back. To further fuel the fire, everyone has a few friends who are empowerers – people who ALWAYS take your side and say things to empower you in everything you do. This is great when you are trying to take a risk and pursue a career as an entrepreneur. This is NOT so great when you are having an argument and asking an empowering friend for advice.

If your empowerer friend is a girl, she will say, “FUCK that guy, you can do better! Let’s dress super slutty, get drunk, and go to the club! You need a boyfriend number two!”

If it is a guy friend, he will say, “You don’t need that bitch, let’s invite some hoes over to get your mind off of things. Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks!”

Sadly, many people fall too deep into what their friends tell them about their relationship that they begin losing touch with it and end up not making their own decision but enforcing the decisions of their friends. It’s okay to seek the advice of the ones you trust the most, but it’s a much better idea to keep to yourself when you and your significant other have little spats. No relationship is perfect – even the most “perfect” couple you see have their fair share of petty arguments. But if you publicize these arguments each and every time, people will start questioning your relationship and whether you realize it or not, you will start questioning it yourself. The next time you and your boo get into an argument, ask YOURSELF – not your friend – if this is something you even need advice for. If you must ask for advice, look to the friend that will weigh in the situation fairly (in other words, the one who DOESN’T always take your side) because you’re looking for actual advice, not what you want to hear. If not, please keep it to yourself. Should you be unfortunate enough to not have a unbiased friend to seek advice from, hit me up!

Don’t even let anyone know that you guys had an argument because before you know it, you will have fixed it between you and him (or her) all by yourselves, like big kids. The fact of the matter is, you are the two in the relationship, not anyone else. Not all guys are unfaithful assholes, and not all girls are deceiving sluts. If you let other people decide for you, you may miss out on a long, crazy, fun-filled journey with your partner, all because you couldn’t keep your shit to yourself.